You just got home from hanging out with friends, but instead of feeling good, your brain is replaying every word you said on a loop — wondering if you talked too much, said something awkward, or if they secretly don’t like you. This “post-social hangover” is a classic sign of social anxiety, and it’s driven by something psychology calls the Spotlight Effect: the false belief that people are paying far more attention to your words and flaws than they actually are.

In this video, Rey NP, a dual-certified nurse practitioner, breaks down why the brain does this and walks through two practical steps to break the replay loop — a “brain dump” technique to get anxious thoughts out of your head and onto paper, and a specific type of distraction that requires enough focus to actually interrupt overthinking.

If this sounds familiar, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad friend or awkward. It usually just means you care about your relationships, and your social battery needs to recharge.